fatvegan

I found lots of mouse poo on the bench this afternoon while I was washing up. And there was another little piece chewed out of the window flyscreen, and left next to the toaster. The bench was also covered in egg shells. They were everywhere. All through the stove top, and behind the Food Mixer Master Juicer Cake-Making Processor Centa™. And the poo was all intermingled with the egg shells. Jem thought that mum might have left the shells there because she was angry and wanted to make a point. About something. But that doesn't explain the poo everywhere.

My only guess is that last night, while mum was cooking up her dinner of 14 eggs and mouse climbed through the fly screen. It had eaten more than usual because it was going to try and make it all the way to the pantry from the window, and it was going to need the energy. From the window to the pantry is quite a distance for a mouse. Especially with the added stress of running across a potentially still-hot stove top.

Because it had eaten so much, it was fatter than normal, so it had to enlarge the whole in the fly screen slightly. Mum didn't notice this as she started to crack the eggs for her dinner. But she did notice when the mouse ran out from behind the Food Centa™ and tried to get to the stove. She was so frightened that she stopped cracking eggs and froze while the mouse snuck between her saucepans and made its way towards the safety of the kettle on the other side. But she regained her wits just as it arrived, and in her panic started hurling eggs at the mouse. Out of fright, the mouse promptly pooed next to the kettle, which I found evidence off today. For several minutes there was a heated battle as mum through the eggs all over the kitchen, where they all smashed. The mouse dodged the eggs, pooing impulsively all over the kitchen bench. However, the mouse found enough time to eat the contents of each egg as it smashed. Mum's throwing shoulder isn't what used to be and she needs to rest between throws. This explains why there where only shells left behind today and not rotten gooey egg everywhere.

When mum had exhausted her dinner/ammunition the mouse rested for a while behind the Food Centa™ pooing spasmodically (which explains the particular large mouse poo concentration in that location). However, having eaten almost 14 eggs, it knew it would never get through the hole in the flyscreen. So it picked the moment, and then bolted across the microwave, jumped onto the dining table, and leapt through the doggy/chicken door - the hole in the door flyscreen which Raja and the chicken have recently made in a joint effort. Raja, of course, gave chase, but was far too fat himself to catch even a mouse that had just consumed over a dozen eggs.

That's the only thing I can think of to explain the situation. Nothing else makes any sense.